My annual drunkest day of the year diary

Every year I take off for the first two days of the NCAA Tournament. That Thursday routinely ends up being the drunkest day of my year. Last year I ended up throwing my shoes and people playing in a pool league and ended up sleeping at 7:00pm across the street in a seedy motel. None of this I remember which means, yes, I was blacked out by about 5:00pm. This year, I did decide to take it a little easier during the day sessions so I can remember the night games. This is, after all, the best sporting event in the world. Also what I decided to do was carry around a pad and write down things that happened. Here's what transpired:
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12:20pm - First 3 games tipped off. First pitcher of Bud Light.
(Changing Times in Northport. The other bar we got to doesn't open til 2pm.)

1:20 - Leprechaun Pics. Kind of early for this.
(There was a cardboard cutout of a leprechaun with the face missing where you can put your face in. It was more of a bored halftime activity more than it was alcohol related.)

2:37 - I lost a bet that I was +18.5 at the half. Awesome. First loss in my brackets.
(Georgia)

3:05 - Got to Instant Replay. Now it begins. Side note - Got hooked up at Changing Times.
("Now it begins" refers to the fact that I drove so now I can turn up the drinking a little bit.)

4:00 - Funniest woman you know?
(I'm pretty sure that we were having a conversation about female comedians.)
Jukebox Songs- Fake Headlines(New Pornographers), In Your Head(Tegan and Sara), Underdog(Spoon), Foundations(Kate Nash) and Wave of Mutilation(Pixies)

4:16 - "You guys should both go fuck John Starks then."
(I don't know why I said that but that conversation did spark the creation of a new drink which I'll touch on later.)

5:00 - Found out a plan for my car. No dinner. Getting Fuuuuuuucked Up!
(Yes...I wrote "u" 7 times.)

5:30 - Drink Game
Bob got mine Cap't Morgan on the Rocks. I drew a car bomb. Dorin got an appletini but traded for a "John Starks" which is a double shot of 151 and any rum of your choice, Dan-Wine Spritzer, Jay traded for said appletini, Craig-Midori Sour and Pete-Hypnotic Breeze.
(In the drink game everyone writes a drink down on a piece of paper and pulls one out of a hat. The hope was that it would be really embarrassing to order or too tough to drink. Needless to say, whoever wrote down car bomb was the least creative member of my group. Also worth mentioning was the trade that happened with the Appletini. The guy who originally got the Appletini traded it because of a situation where he was hit on by a guy at a bar who bought him an appletini and, rumor has it, nuzzled his nose on his cheek. I wasn't there so I can't confirm it.)

6:20 - "Don't tell me how to drink this," says Bob
(Having problems with his Cap't Morgan on the rocks.)

7:00 -Me and Dorin lost at Pool

8:00 - I'm doing a Jager Bomb!!
-I'm going to be 2-3 so far (betting)
-We're playing the game again. I have another easy one.
(I don't remember what it was.)

9:15 - First Jager Bomb ever. FIRST JAGER BOMB EVER
(See 8:00. I'm obviously in trouble.)

10:35 - Jager Bombs!!!
Nicole: I want to punch her in the mouth.
(I have no idea who Nicole is or who she wants to punch in the mouth.)

11:20 - Apparently I'm doing a Jager Bomb!!!

3:30 - Played Rockband and Singstar 90's
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I can't wait to do it again next year.

This is kind of scary

I graduated with a BA in Communications but kind of forgot what kind of jobs I can get with that useless degree. So I go to Yahoo! and do a search for "Careers with a communication degree" and look what comes up. I'll give you a minute.

http://search.yahoo.com/search?p=careers+with+a+communications+degree&fr=yfp-t-501-s&toggle=1&cop=mss&ei=UTF-8

You've got to be kidding me. I almost just cried for the first time since I've seen Hardball.

Going to my happy place

Every year I take off for the 1st two days of the NCAA Tournament. It's pretty much four days of drinking and college basketball. Easily my two favorite days of the year.

My Final 4 is UNC, Stanford, Kansas and Louisville with UCLA beating Kansas in the Championship. I will be wrong.

Check out my Six Pack - Volume 1 - Long Trail IPA

Even though I'm almost 30, the type of beer I drink is not unlike it was when I was in college. Not that I feel I'm above the cheap beer. If someone hands me a Bud Light, MGD, Golden Anniversary or a Steel Reserve I'll drink it appreciatively. But I felt like it was time to see what else is out there. Every week I usually get a six pack during the week and settle in to watch a sporting event. Usually it's just Bud Light or Stella, but now I'm going get one of a beer I've never had before. Last week I had Smuttynose's Portsmouth Lager and Anchor Steam (It was a two 6-pack week). This week I had Long Trail Brewery's IPA. As a guy who drinks alot of beer, I only this week learned that IPA actually stands for India Pale Ale. Go figure.

Long Trail describes it like: We've brewed our filtered IPA for 13 years, and never considered offering the REAL (unfiltered) version that is naturally carbonated just as it comes out of our fermenters. Well here it is! We hope you enjoy our REAL IPA.

I don't know who I'm kidding. I can't pick up flavors or anything. I can just tell you that I didn't make a face on my first sip which is a good sign. A six-pack for me is usually just enough to get me a mini buzz and give me a quality nights sleep. I must admit, after my six pack, I did blend up a margarita. Maybe it gave me a buzz good enough that I didn't want to stop drinking? Let's go with that. It was 5.9% Alcohol content.

I don't want to set the bar too high because there should be many six packs to come, so I will give it 4.5 out of 6. (Get it....six pack) I'm still coming up with the graphic.

By the way, if you thought this was a blog about my abs, I don't want you to come back here anymore.

My soccer jersey

About 2 years ago I realized I have nothing really cool to wear for St. Patrick's Day except for some t-shirt someone gave me from Kohl's like 5 years ago. I decided (despite my hatred for the sport) that an Ireland soccer jersey would be the tits. My perfect shirt size is an XLT which isn't really easy to find so I usually go between an XL and XXL depending on the garment. To err on the side of caution, I ordered myself a XXL Ireland soccer jersey online for like 90 bucks justifying the purchase as something I'll wear for many March 17ths to come. About 5 days later it shows up and I go try it on. Apparently the website failed to mention that soccer equipment has it's own different size charts not unlike how a men's medium is different than a women's medium. Turns out a soccer XXL is like a men's L. Needless to say, when I tried it on, it needed to be helped off. Now this is my own fault because I should have realized that I've never seen a guy my size play soccer, therefore, a XXL isn't probably a popular size in that sport. On top of that, soccer jerseys aren't exactly "flowey." For some reason I couldn't return it though. It was the highest size they had and I did/do still want it. So I stashed it in my closet so maybe one day I'll fit into it should I eventually ever choose to actually take care of myself. I hear chicks do that. Anyway, I've eaten healthy for the last few months and been occasionally going to the gym and actually shed a few pounds. So I'm going to give it another shot this year. I'm not hopeful though. It was REALLY tight two years ago.

What a way to end a vacation

I was scheduled to fly from Orlando to JFK at 12:35pm on Friday Feb 22nd. There was bad weather in the Northeast so I went online and called the customer service hotline and they both said that the flight was pushed back to about 4:00pm. No big deal. It happens all the time. So we stayed put and left later for our flight instead of hanging out in the airport for a few hours. On the way to the airport, we called AA again to see if the flight was delayed any further. It turns out that the flight was scheduled to go at 1:00pm now meaning we were missing the flight. To make a long story short, we had to fly to Miami and then be put on standby for a flight to JFK. After not getting on two standby flights (by one person each time no less) and having to sleep in a mouse infested terminal (I consider six or seven mice in one concentrated area an infestation), we got on a flight at 6:50am on Saturday to LaGuardia. That meant we still had to go to JFK to pick up our bags which

went out on the first flight we were on standby for...which was nice. Otherwise it was a good trip.

Last Day of Work???

Today is my last day of work for at least a week (vacation) and possibly longer if those lotto tickets to the left work out.

Lent

I'm not a religious guy. I can't remember the last time I went to church for anything other than a wedding or a funeral. Nevertheless, I've been giving stuff up for lent for as long as I can remember. In the past it was easy because I would just give up soda and fast food. This year though I'm still holding to my New Years Resolution to eat healthier so I haven't had Coke or fast food yet this year so I was at a loss as to what to give up this time. Here was my thought process:

• I'm not a huge "sweet" eater. If I went to a restaurant and had to choose between choosing to have an appetizer or dessert, pass me some boneless buffalo wings. So sweets aren't good enough.
• That being said, I was thinking about not having appetizers when I go out to eat (I go out to eat alot). But I'm going on a cruise soon and apps will be too "in my face". I also go out for the NCAA Tournament every year where Mozzerella Sticks and Wings become a big part of it. Giving up appetizers would be setting myself up for failure.
• Alcohol? I would be willing to try it if the timing was different. I think it would actually benefit me in a big way. Imagine how much my tolerance would go down? I'd spend alot less on beer when it was over. Alas, Lent happens during St. Patty's Day and the NCAA Tournament. I'm all for giving up something hard, not impossible.
• If I was dropped on a desert island and can have only one food dropped down to me for each meal, it would be cheese burgers...easily. That's probably doable.

So I gave up cheese burgers. Not just burgers though. Beef as a whole. No Philly Cheesesteaks, no pasta with meat sauce. I'm making due with Chicken and Turkey.

If you read a news story on Easter about a guy running around a field taking bites out of cattles, that'll be me.

My prediction for this weekend

With the Super Bowl looming there are a lot of predictions being made so it's only fitting that I made mine for the weekend. And with that: I do believe Punxsutawney Phil will indeed see his shadow tomorrow. Take it to the bank.

Super Bowl Predictions

-- I will lose money.
-- I will look at my box numbers 4,000 times, instantly forgetting them each time.
-- I will drink and eat, possibly to excess.
-- I will not watch the half-time show.
-- I will make an ill-advised halftime bet to recoup losses, only to further increase said losses.
-- I will come close to winning a box, only to have it squandered by a last-minute drive.
-- I will ask up to three waitresses wearing a Giants' jersey to marry me.
-- If I drink too much, I might ask two guys the same question.
-- By the time the clock expires, I will vow to never: gamble, drink, eat, propose again.

Score: Pats 35, Giants 28

Let me check if I have 5-8...

Nope.

So I saw Cloverfield...

Unfortunately last weekend I had to cancel my trip to Philly to see the Rhett Miller concert for reasons explained in my last post. I did try to salvage the weekend a little by going to see Cloverfield.

I'll start by saying that I'm one of those people where J.J. Abrams is now with Kevin Smith and Judd Apatow as guys who I'll give anything they have a hand in a chance (although I'm not going to see his reboot of the Star Trek franchise).

My favorite things about the movie:

• I'm very impressed that the budget was only 25 million or so. For a movie that looked like it was filmed with a hand-held camera, the effects were pretty good. I actually think that if a giant monster started attacking New York City while I was in there, that's pretty much what it would look like.
• While I never got nauseous like a lot of people apparently did, the length was perfect for a movie shot with a shaky camera P.O.V.
• Before the monster started attacking the city, the music being played at the party was pretty cool. I went in to a monster movie not expecting to hear "The Underdog" by Spoon or "Four Winds" from Bright Eyes.

My least favorite things about the movie:

• My main complaint about the movie was actually the first twenty minutes or so. I understand that they had to make up care about the characters a little bit but I didn't. There was not one moment where I thought, "Gosh, I really hope ___________ doesn't get killed." But that's because I rarely say "Gosh." But yeah, I didn't care about a single character in the movie.

This movie, as J.J Abram's vehicles seem to be leaning towards now, had a large viral marketing campaign. Personally, I didn't follow along. Apparently there was fake websites giving hints and clues about things that could be seen in the movie if you paid closer attention. I wish I could have followed along but when I'm at work I just don't have the time. Maybe if I did, I would have liked the movie even more than I did. If I'm doing stars again, I'll probably do 3 and a half out of 5. It would have been a 4 if there was somebody for me to root for to live.

Not liking my chances

• I'm supposed to be going to Philadelphia tomorrow for a Rhett Miller concert. Like with most things that I try to do, it can never just be easy. Of course my girlfriend (who is coming with me) left work sick today. I'm unsure of how to ask her about how her illness will affect the plan without being insensitive so I probably won't. I'll probably just go to sleep and wake up tomorrow under the assumption that everything will work out. It generally does, but it seems like every time I'm gearing up for fun there is some underlying obstacle that can possibly prevent it. Just for the record, I'm not blaming her. People get sick. I'm just looking at it from the selfish side of things about how it affects me.
• Generally the day before a concert I'll be listening to that artist up until the show. Being that I have a long drive tomorrow I figured that I'd save Rhett Miller for the car ride. Since I'm trying to listen to CDs I haven't heard before this year I've decided to start with ones that I've owned for awhile but never listen to. Back in college at the University at Buffalo I was pretty big into The Tragically Hip being so close to the border and all. Turns out that I had two whole albums that I've never even put on. So today I listened to In Between Evolution and In Violet Light. In Violet Light came out in 2002 and I got it probably the week it came out. Back when I had money (good times) I used to just buy up CDs. How does it happen that I owned a CD for over 5 years before listening to it? Bad job by me. I probably have countless others. Anyway, the two albums are pretty good. I'll keep them in my rotation for the time being. They are a quality musical group.
• There was a time a few months ago where I was into that SingStar karaoke game for PS2. But in those two months I feel it started to get a little worn out. EVERY single night seemed to end with me battling it out with someone singing Heart of Glass or We Built This City (On Rock and Roll). Anyway, coming this March my interest could be renewed. SingStar 90's comes out. Now I get to wreck shop vocally to Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm and even though it doesn't sound like something a dude should admit, I don't see anyone beating me in Stay by Lisa Loeb...especially if I break out some thick framed glasses as a prop.

Have a good weekend,

Slice

The Jewish Sinatra

Who is Neil Diamond? Brilliant songcrafter or sequined sex symbol for the sexagenarian set. While I'm the first one to cry 'Cheese' at the onset of another drunken 'Sweet Caroline' singalong, I cannot deny the man's genius. Case in Point: 12 Songs, Diamond's 2005 collaboration with producer/prophet Rick Rubin. Stripped of the glitz and scent of Avon-tinged sweat, this album exposes the reason why this legend has been around for 40 years and still going strong. He writes great songs!

Give this album a listen and I guarantee you will forgive his Vegas shmaltz, his acting in the Jazz Singer, even the fact that he has to kill drifters in order to achieve an erection.

So I saw There Will Be Blood

I wanted to like it. I really did. Maybe that was the problem. I went in with giant expectations and it didn't totally pay off for me. Daniel Day Lewis was very good. Well deserving of all the accolades coming his way. Not to mention that this was over a two and a half hour movie and he was in every single scene. I get that it was a grand character piece and I'm normally on board for these type of films but there really wasn't that much drama. No surprises. Just a long slow decent fueled by greed and power.

The movie was scored very well. If I was ranking this movie on a 5 star scale, it might be worth one star on it's own. It was sporadic, haunting and intense if that makes any sense. My only issue with it was that when the music started, it seemed to allude to something dramatic happening that never came.

There are probably going to be some arguments on which film is the year's Best Picture between this and No Country for Old Men. For me it's a no contest. No Country for Old Men was the better movie. Anybody who feels the same way will be combated by movie elitists who tell you that you "didn't get it" or "had to have a great deal of patience to enjoy a movie like this" and I say fuck that. I would have sat in that theatre for 6 hours as long as it's entertaining me.

Maybe I will rate it on a 5 star scale:
3 stars. As much as it seemed like I hated it, I didn't. I just didn't love it. I went in expecting to see the next great American film and I did not. Great performance, beautifully shot and wonderfully scored and still worth seeing.

One week into the Resolutions

So it's been a little over a week until I made my pointless (...or are they) New Year's resolutions. I've decided to give a quick update on how they are going to start to satisfy my first resolution:

1. Contribute to the blog at least 3 times a week - Not going well since this is my first post of the New Year and I'm only writing this so at least if I write one the next two days, I can still keep a check next to it.
2. Stop biting my fingernails and cuticles - It was an effort in futility. I just can't stop.
3. Do some form of creative writing for at least a half hour a day - Roughly nine days into it I'm 4 and a half hours behind. Do the math...not one thing.
4. Eat a little bit healthier (key words "a little bit"...I don't want to live in a world where I can't eat Cheese steaks and drink Coke once and a while) - This is where I'm surprisingly wrecking shop. Only eating one bad meal so far (a monster Italian smorgasbord) and I have not had one single soda since New Year's. Go me. DRINKING ALCOHOL DOES NOT COUNT!
5. Listen to one new CD (new to me) a week - I tried listening to the new Sia so the effort was half there. I'm still convinced she has only the one good song though.
6. Bring lunch to work at least 3 times a week - This kind of correlates with #4 because when I bring my own lunch I'm not going to restaurants with their gargantuan American portions...god I miss those gargantuan American portions

Maybe I just had too many. I'm kind of revising the creative writing one into something else. It morphed into if I don't have at least two drafts of a screenplay done by 2009 then I'm giving up that silly dream forever. My Final Draft software will be up on eBay at the stroke of midnight.

My Hair

My life is a neverending quest to constantly test myself in order to achieve new growth. I decided to demonstrate that growth in the most literal sense. My hair. I'm growing it. Get it?

Now, this is not to say that my hair is long by normal standards. But, it is long for me. For the last ten years or so, I've pretty much rocked a flip: #2 razor on the sides and back and a flip up top. And I think I looked damn good in it, despite the fact that my hairline resembles John Travolta's in The Punisher. Yet, I felt unchallenged. Unoriginal.

Where the upside of growing my hair is very clear (groupies), there is of course the dark side that few people talk about. The awkward stage. Mine has lasted about seven weeks. And there is no sign of a reprieve.

If anything, it's beginning to mutate into something rather terrifying

I went to the restroom just before writing this and I caught sight of it in the mirror. For a second, I thought I was hallucinating that my hair was replaced by Elton John's wig.

That is NOT the look I was going for.

My resolutions

To follow in the footsteps of the esteemed Vanderslice, here is my list of futility for the coming year:

1. Make more money.
2. See things through from start to finish.
3. Blog more.
4. Drink less.
5. Quit gambling.
6. Embrace a more creative-minded existence.
7. Figure out what #6 means.
8. Focus.
9. Ask for help more freely.
10. Work toward a life where I don't need as much help.

I just executed half of these in the course of this entry.

This finally could be my year....

The resolutions I won't keep

Every year I basically have one New Year's resolution. Stop biting my fingernails and cuticles. I'm usually pretty decent at it until March when I'm watching 12 straight hours of college basketball and realize that I've unknowingly went to town on my fingertips. By then, what's done is done and I just keep at it until New Years again. This year I'm going to have a couple of New Year's resolutions so if one of them sticks then I'll feel pretty good about myself. Here they are:

1. Contribute to the blog at least 3 times a week
2. Stop biting my fingernails and cuticles
3. Do some form of creative writing for at least a half hour a day
4. Eat a little bit healthier (key words "a little bit"...I don't want to live in a world where I can't eat Cheesesteaks and drink Coke once and a while)
5. Listen to one new CD (new to me) a week
6. Bring lunch to work at least 3 times a week

So I saw Juno...

Every Christmas evening I go to the movies. This year I opted for Juno. The theatre was surprisingly packed for a 4:00pm on Christmas. With Kiterunner and The Great Debaters already sold out and standing on the back of a long line with only 25 minutes til the movie started, I wasn't feeling too confident in getting tickets. Luckily enough, simultaneously with the two tickets being placed in my hands the guy behind the ticket counter announced that Juno has been sold out. For the first time probably ever, I had to bypass the refreshment counter in favor of getting a seat. Predictably my special lady friend and I had to sit in the second row. Normally I have a problem with this because the last time I had to sit up front for a movie was actually 7 years to the day for Dracula 2000 (Gerard Butler...how far you have come). Even though it was a terrible movie, my head actually had to turn from side to side to follow the action and I still think I have the kink in my neck. Nevertheless, I knew that this movie was a dialouge driven film and probably wouldn't have to lube up my neck joints for it. As for the movie, I really enjoyed it. The dialogue was fast-paced and chock full of pop-culture references which is always a hit with me. There was only one problem I had with the movie and it did have to do with some of the dialogue. For the most part the slangy phrases worked but once and awhile it was overkill. It was only two or three times total but it was glaring enough to me where I thought about it and I imagine that's not what the film makers want me to be thinking at those moments. Other than that, Ellen Page was great (very pleased to find out she's 20 for reasons I don't want to delve in to here). One could even say she was perfect for the role of Juno. I celebrate everything Micheal Cera does at this point. Even though I'm a little nervous that he's a one trick pony with his perfected timing in doing the awkward and uncomfortable thing. Even if he is, that's a pony I'd like to ride for awhile. That sounded bad. J.K. Simmons and Jason Bateman were also very good. Simmons as Juno's dad was perfect in playing the disappointed but supportive father. The one character that I didn't particularly care for was Juno's best friend Leah. She was slightly irritating but I guess that it was nessesary since Juno was a pretty mature 16 year old and Leah was that reminder that she is only 16. The soundtrack fit the movie well also. It was mostly "cute" acoustic guitar, indie-rock stuff but also some cool stuff from Belle and Sebastian, and the Sonic Youth cover of Superstar by The Carpenters that I forgot existed.

Adventures in Solitude - New Pornographers 12/11/07

-Last night I went to a free New Pornographers at the Apple Store in SoHo. It's the fourth time I've seen them in 2007 (5th overall) but this was the first time I've ever seen an in-store performance, the first time I've ever seen a concert by myself and the first time seeing them sober.
-I'm usually not one to do something like this by myself. I did once go to the movies alone. All my friends saw Black Hawk Down before me and I guess it was a very important movie for me to see before it came out on DVD, so I tried that. Didn't like it much. So for me to actually get on a train and go into NYC myself was pretty out of character. I probably would have only done it for The New Pornographers...or any movie with helicopters.
-I got to the Apple Store at about 6:30ish. I was a little nervous approaching the store because I saw a line of people that started to bend around the corner but it was only about 45-50 people deep. A guy from the Apple Store gave me a bracelet and told me that it guaranteed my spot in the show but not my place in line. A minute later a girl with a British accent was on line (the queue) behind me talking on her cell phone. Just curious to see what she looked like since accents are awesome, I did the "stretching my back" turnaround. Let down.
-After about an hour and a half, they let us in. There were only 80-90 seats so I was lucky enough to get one on the good side of the stage where Neko Case stands. I had to be careful here. It was such an intimate setting that she probably could probably see me if she looked into the crowd. I had to keep my staring problem in check. Easier said than done when she's on stage.
-The show lasted pretty much an hour which apparently is a long time for an in-store. It was 10 songs plus an encore. The only weird thing was that the Apple Store hooked up a camera and projected the show on the screen behind them but with about a 2 second delay. It started out as an annoyance but soon became a pretty funny part of the show with the band commenting on it throughout the set.
-All in all it was definately worth going. I learned that I can go to a concert and not drink, I learned that not everyone with an accent is going to be attractive and I learned I can go out and enjoy a form of entertainment by myself. I might even try a movie again one day...maybe if they do a Fire Birds sequel or bring Airwolf to the big screen.

Setlist:
1. All The Things That Go To Make Heaven and Earth
2. Use It
3. All The Old Showstoppers
4. Challengers
5. My Rights Versus Yours
6. Adventures in Solitude
7. The Laws Have Changed
8.Unguided
9. Sing Me Spanish Techno
10. Don't Bring Me Down (ELO cover)
Encore
11. Bleeding Heart Show